Thursday, June 07, 2007

Sometimes I have to wonder why the Cyr family can't catch a break. I know, I understand the "everything happens for a reason" mantra and that "God doesn't give you anything you can't handle" but I mean SERIOUSLY. The extreme ups and downs are just sucking. It's not like a sunny day, then it rains, it's like, we built a mansion then a tornado came through just to say hi.

The Good:
Mom and I drove down to camp on Thursday, and it was really fun, and nice. I don't think we've spent that much uninterrupted time together in.....months? I made a huge playlist of all songs that represent everyone in our family and they were great to sing to. Then we got Aunt Annie's pretzels, which always rock my world.
Camp was beyond amazing of course. We got settled into our lodge which was gooorgeous and had some time to kill before dinner so we just sat outside and read for awhile. Then Karen found us, and we talked forever and she taught my mom how to drive the golf cart. Camp is so beautiful this time of year and it is truly so strange how while you're there, all negative or confusing thoughts just leave your mind, and you're just THERE. In the moment, being peaceful and young. I needed it more than I realized.
Dinner was a vegetarian feast of pita, couscous, hummus and everything amazing that I adore, and they had pitchers of iced chai at every table. Delish. After, of course, there was singing, and Marissa, one of Maisy's counselors grabbed me and pulled me into the circle and said "oh come on Mal...." because usually I try to keep a low profile before I speak, then I get in with everyone after. But I did join in and the first song we sang was Seasons of Love. Thanks guys. Followed by Hero (maisy recorded last summer at camp), and Can You Feel the Love tonight (first NYC moment). Gah.
We went up to the theater for a "campfire" since it was raining, and they did that whole thing...ending of course with Stars in the Sky... all of this working up to my speech. Thaaaaanks.
Before my speech, they played the camp video from 98 when I climbed the wall, which of course made me cry because not only is the video playing but the entire theater was cheering and saying "YEAAA MAL." like I was doing it again! that's camp for ya.
THEN Matty read off my intro and credentials (which did sound pretty impressive I must say) and Peaches and Hilary marched into the theater in graduation gowns singing pomp and circumstance with the biggest bouquet of flowers I've ever seen. It was amazing.
THEN I had to speak. But I did, and it was awesome and I think it was one of the best speeches I've given, like ever...
This sounds silly, but I know it's the power of that stage. Do you know all of the people who have been on that stage.... No you probably don't...cause I don't, but just of the ones I know, it's pretty amazing. And you can feel it. It's so cool to think of how many little kids will be able to be on that stage without even knowing the power of it. It's pretty unreal.

After my speech we went back to the dining hall and had ice cream and just socialized. Eventually it was just me and mom and Noodle and it so quiet except for the crickets and summer night noises and it was just perfect. One of those times you just want to freeze to carry with you when you need that kind of atmosphere.

The next day, we drove home, and felt hungover with emotional exhaustion but it was still nice to spend time with mom. I wish we could do that more often. But I guess the more time that passes, the more we have to talk about.

On Friday, Maisy had friends over, and we all went to Portland and I had a SUPER amazing shopping trip. One of those where you just get so many good deals, you go home and end up forgetting how much you bought. It was lovely.
I christened our Coach store too and the girls were SOOOOOOO sweet. I tried on sunglasses and really wanted to buy them, but they were > $100 so I decided to be good...
Maybe with the first paycheck. hee hee.
But I did get this:
(for those who don't know.. it's an amazing teeny wallet that fits all my worldly necessities)

Cause I needed a new one. My other one is from last year, and I bought with Megan. Er...time for a new one....

and there was Sushi to be had, and sales to be utilized, and it was just amazingly perfect.
Then we came home...

The Bad:
Long story short. We had the dog put down this past weekend. He bit one of Maisy's friends (the third or fourth person he's ever bitten) and she didn't clean it out (cause she's stupid and irresponsible) even though Maisy persistently asked her if she was ok. she ended up going to the ER, the cops were called. It was a drama of dramas. Later that same night, he bit Maisy. Not just nipped.

We knew it would happen eventually, and in all reality, we just bought him time. He wasn't realistic to have as a pet. He was unpredictable. We couldn't have people in our house unless my mom was home to go through the "routine." If anyone else tried...well, we know what happens.

It's a blessing in disguise (house party anyone?), but man, even though I bitched about him all the time, it suuuuucked. I woke up on Sunday morning as late as possible, and Dad had been on the phone with various vets and animal people. I came out of my room to get coffee just as he went out the door. Maisy was just standing in the hallway, hysterical. The kind where you cry so hard there isn't any noise...
I told her it was ok, and it wasn't her fault. Then we just sat on the couch and held each other and cried. She broke my heart.
After a while we were composed (semi...) and I started making breakfast, and she went to watch TV in her room (I seriously was afraid to let her go, I didn't want any emo episodes) Then dad came home. He said that was one of the hardest things he's ever done, then he went in Maisy's room and we all cried together some more. Yea, my dad cried. That pretty much did us both in again. But somehow it just seemed right that we were all together. We got it together once again and we all sat down and had brunch together, and laughed about how I'd have to get out of the habit of throwing food on the floor, and whether our cats would all move downstairs and back into our house. (still hasn't happened)

It was a rough morning to say the least, but then Maisy went to the farm to take her mind of things, Dad and I went to Verizon (helloooooo TREO) and we all reconvened at Nana's for dinner and I had a luxurious cosmo with my favoritest aunt. and we all played cards.
My mom still is pretty upset, since they were the tightest, and it is definitely way lonely here when I'm all by myself during the day. But things are easier now...sadly. And I will have my flip flops for a long long time. I guess it just ends another chapter....
but seriously? Where is the break.... we just didn't need that.

RIP EVIL PUPPY :(...please don't bite God...

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