Sometimes I just want to go back to being 17. When I didn't know any better. To the days when DD ice coffees were orgasmic, every Denny's trip was exciting and dancing in the Oak Hill gym til 11 was a "crazy night out."

It's really weird to think how things can change...and will never ever be the same. Things happen and are said. People come and go from your life, and you just never know. You can only live one day at a time. but when you take it all in and really look back. Just wow. I don't even know.

Of course it's super cold out tonight and the heat came on, which means winter is coming, which means I'm getting depressedish and emotional.... even though this year will be soooo different I can't help it.

Right now I need to just pull myself away from 2002 Mix CD's, old Facebook wall comments, and pictures and give myself to sleep for awhile. Tomorrow's another day. and it isn't Monday!


xoxoxo.

oh yea... and the Halloween fun has begun....

Oh it's been crazy. Not crazy good, or crazy bad.Just crazy.
The 80's social was pretty much amazing and can probably be logged as "THE event of the year." We had an incredible turnout, the music and people were amazing, I went without a single cent, had drinks covered for me (cause I'm fab like that) and oh yea I WON the costume contest! Weeeeeeee. It was just amazing.


The next day my knees hurt soooo hard from dancing. It was lovely.


Since then, stuffs been kinda up and down. The weekend was nice. I slept for like 12+ hours, which I pretty much needed, like whoa...
Then this week, I've just been kinda rollin' with things, trying to get my work done, and not fail out of school. I think I'm doing ok! yay for that.

Last night was pretty fabulous too. I worked a little bit on a paper that isn't due until next week, which I felt good about, then I was at the snackbar with Miss Andrea and Mary, and Meg randomly called me and asked if I wanted to go to the bar with them. I didn't really have anything pressing to do, so I said suuuuuure.
Meg, Jen, Caitlin and I all went down to the bar, in the pouring rain...almost got attacked by a skunk, but finally got there and had a lovely time. I was cold and soggy, and got an amazing Irish coffee, which is like a Denny's cappucinno x 50.
we all hung out, until Meg and I started making fun of people a little too evidently and had to remove ourselves to another room where there were other people and it was fun. Then Caitlin and Jen left and a while later, and we trudged home in the even worse pouring rain. But it was pretty amazing and we didn't care.

That's the stuff memories are made of!


Next up. HALLOWEEN DANCE 10/26 @ 10:07 pm (haha, don't ask me thats just what the schedule said!) BE THERE!!!!

Tonight was busy, but after my two meetings, I snuck off to The Landing and listened to the band they had there. I splurged and bought the CD and felt so at peace with being alone. and the new Landing is gorgeous. I need to go there more often, like I did a couple years ago. It's wonderful for some reflection and me time. They have surprisingly good music too I discovered..(and had discovered the night of Rachel Griffin)

Now I'm off to seriously relax, read and go to sleeeeeeeep! Yay for surviving another Hump Day!

Check out The Whatnot!

<3

It's Fall. And stuff like this makes me wish I had an apartment super bad. Oh yea, and I just watched the Laguna Beach thing on Overdrive, which showed one of their rediculously glamorous, way too big houses. That helped.

The maple stuff is out at Starbucks too. I may have to try the maple machiatto when I go home this weekend. Last year, only Canada had it.... and Maine...cause we're basically Canada.

Last night was fun. But I still feel like this week is just weird. Everyone feels kind of off.... but what can you do. I tried to have a night in, but like after three episodes of "Strangers with Candy" and 45 minutes of Gilmore Girls (yes, yet another guilty pleasure) I got super antsy and ended up going to the bar with Meg, then again with Nate and Roxanne, and hung out in their apartment til like 2.
It was fun though. It was a gorgeous night, and I really just wanted to be out doing something since pretty soon it'll be too cold to want to go anywhere. The moon was pretty, and it was just a very laid back good time. I needed the fresh air.
Now it's wednesday, and I sort of have a busy day, and it's blah. But we have a class meeting tonight, then LAGUNA. and I may subscribe to CosmoGirl I've decided. It's cheap....

on that note.

xoxoxox.

Oh fall. What can I say....

I feel like it's been a really significant past week, and I'm basically a different person since last October...but we've still come full circle it seems. It's just weird. who knows.

Last week was really good though. I went out like five days in a row, which yes, is a little crazy, but it was fabulous. For the first time I feel like I'm really LIVING in college. And I truly do have the best friends like ever.
Thursday we all went to the bar and even though there was definitely Fall in the air, we all at on the patio with our drinks and just talked and laughed for hours. It was really really wonderful. It's so great to feel like I finally have a "group" and it kind of includes everyone.

Then Friday I slept on the way home then quickly changed and Jordan and I hit up Gritty's, which is kind of becoming our Friday tradition. It was really fun. I have not laughed that hard in sooooo long. It was much needed for both of us. Saturday was Aimee and Margarita's. Basically I've just been seeing everyone and having a good time, which is pretty much what I need to do, because otherwise I find fall is kind of tough. and some things have happened, which have left me kind of confused emotionally, but it's nothing serious, just a strange replay of last Fall I guess.

Sunday, I ended the weekend with a dinner of filet mignon with my family and a hot bath to warm up and rejuvenate before coming back. It was pretty much amazing.

I'm kind of ready for a downish week now, and definitely another weekend. Family coziness, friends, and pumpkin spice lattes, preeeetty much make my life.

autumn <3

Sometimes old habits are heard to break... even if it isn't something intentional. Last night there were serious bouts of insomnia. I woke up at 5ish, and basically just could not fall back to sleep. I don't know why. Could've been the fact that I slept in all weekend and broke my pattern of a good schedule, or the fact that I couldn't breathe through my nose. But either way, after 5 a.m. I pretty much saw every hour on the clock and didn't fall asleep til I basically had to get up anyway.
When I woke up, I randomly listened to Clay Aiken... yes, make fun of me, but I adore his music, and it was an instant transportation to freshmen year, since that CD basically got me through the rough nights. So between the not feeling so hot, the reminiscent music, and the epitome of fall in the air, things got sort of sentimental. I think my mind (and heart) is just so used to spending the fall missing certain things... that it just thought it was supposed to, even though this year is so very different.

I took a nap after my first class, and slept way better than my entire night's sleep... but still, I just keep thinking about things. Also... I think it's just because I'm really lonely... and it's kind of hitting me. Not like depressed, solitary emo-ness...but it sucks I guess....

Anyway... my nap was nice, and I had dinner and coffee with Miss Caitlin... but man... sometimes it just hits harder than others. It's weird.

wake me up when September ends.... basically.

Whooooa. It's senior year. Craziness. Unbelievable really. Buuuuuuut. For the first time, I'm reaaaaaaally happy. It's like I finally know who my friends are, and how to manage time and all that jazz and can finally just sit back and have fun.

A lot happened this summer and basically I just feel like I'm a new person with a new outlook and a new attitude so I really think it'll be a good year....since it mostly has been already...
My room is pink and amazingly cute. smaller but I don't even notice the difference really, it works for me!
Here's a peek:




It is SUCH a different lifestyle from the stupid, all girl, mostly freshman floor I put up with for so long. I don't know why I didn't do that sooner.... oy vey! It's so good.

Anyway. obviously a ton of stuff has happened and I can't give the entire lodown here cause well.... it'd take me a week.... but I'll simplify and just discuss some of the key players in my life right now...since oh, you know, they'll be mentioned a buuuunch!
(for the dramatic crew who may read this, I swear this order is random, so get over it....and if you're not mentioned...then...welll.....do something nice for me and maybe you will be)

The Girls:
Andrea: aka- ; or the soulmate. We spent a ton of time together this summer and talked 24/7. She is my other half, knows everything that goes on in my life and basically completes me and makes school worth going to. k thanks.

Kerry: fabulous, chill bff from last year, she's in rehab. but we still enjoy numerous bar trips. She's a cool kid. Also my photographer. Most of the good pictures that are up here, are probably Kerry Brown originals

Meg: A crazy amazing wine. and laguna lover who also completes me. We hate people together and make fun of freshmen. Hey, sometimes it's too easy.

Caitlin: A fabulous fashion diva, who enjoys coffee and shopping almost as much as myself. we had lovely beach festivities this summer and are super tight.

Rachel: Sadly, she does not to F'ton, but we've been bffs since high school, I would not have made it through the summer without her. We are soulmates in theater, boys....and theater boys..... hehe

The Boys:

Colin: The opposite gendered soulmate. he's in CT which saddens me, but when he isn't, we see movies, spend way too much time together, belt bad 80's music, drink at Applebee's and pretty much finish each others sentences..... yeaaaa, it's a good time. oh yea he's good at music stuff.... psh.

Matt: silly, younger than me poly-sci nerd who doesn't believe in segways (like the transition, not the scooter), he likes to ditch me for Family Guy or Jimmy Kimmel.

Brandon: Knows how to have a good time. Has a hot tub, and is known for taking me on random Roadtrips to be a groupie for Colin's accapella group. oh we have fun. <3 him

Doyon, Roland, Adam G, et. al.- the other boys who come to parties and always provide good story telling and drunken (or not drunken) musical performances....they make my life pretty much!



Ok, so basically those are the tried and true. What can I say. Now, after being entirely lazy all day, I must sign out and be lazy some more, where it will eventually lead to bed. Back to school tomorrow for more adventures.

~You know you love me.
<3


and an updated pic, cause you know, it's been like A YEAR!!!